As a great man once said "Beer ...the cause of and solution to all my problems".
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This rant may go on and on but i'd like to start with the destructive aspects of a good drinking bent. Well mine anyway.
Besides the supposed damage to certain rear echelon organs (liver ....what the fuck is that good for other than Pate!!!) i realise i have had a number of other physical/material booze related inconveniences....
1. Broken : 4th Metacarpal bone ... Ring finger (its a sign) . Dublin New Years Eve 199? 6 Hours in casualty ...heavy tack!
2. Torn : Entire left sleeve off me Auntie's damn fine brushed suede wool lined jacket. Spiked fence i could have easily walked around.
3. Lost : Sunglasses ...countless pairs.
Wallet ...only once touch wood
Phone ...Never ! More wood
Plot ....Irretrievable
Hours ....Ha ! The Amber Abyss consume thee !
4. Fractured : Anterior Vertebrae , Lumbar 2,3 & 4 .... cost me $300 because i was bed-locked for a week so I had to buy an Xbox. The constipation from the painkillers was far more painful that the back situation.... By the way.
5. Severely Scruffed : Jeans , jackets, t-shirts , footwear .....
Hmmm, right i'm off for a pint ....for inspiration.
2 comments:
One day we shall see the Dawn of the All Terrain High-Heel ...fear not. But yer right, stay off the sissy plonk ...its designed to maim. My hat is off to you !.... and now i can't find it ....did you take my hat ? hey das me hah ye feckin fecker i seen yu n rgghgrhh.....c'mere n say da me ha'....me mnmhmnmhmmm.....
just drink till you cant stand. then get someone to carry you. then it doesnt really matter what your wearing on your feet.
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